Godly Humor Volume One

Godly Humour Volume One

the funny side of life

A-float

Invisible Man

A leap above and beyond.

Birds will be birds.

Spear ready!

Will to win it!

Men at the beach.

It's a running joke that you are always in the lead!

Angels in civvies.

Fist brother.

Hello!

Alive on Mars!

Avenging Angel

 "Greased Lightnin'"

Killed it!

Windfalls

Mirror Souls

High Flyers!

Sittin' on a Fence

What to do with your plants before leaving.

Flying Man

The King of Racing

Thou shalt not kill.

Inertia

Police Pursuits.

Are you in on this?

A man and his dog.

Angels find peace in Nature.

Mammoth Riders

Masked Up

Globetrotter

Face of Mars

Trip to Earth

Universe Man

Living Presence

Why hang your harp on the willow?

If you can find no fault in yourself, hang your harp on the nearest willow, for your progress is at an end.

What do angels do for fun in heaven?

Follicular Follies.

String and Bead Work

If you are perfect, this world is no place for you.

 A Phantasm of Creatures

Cloudsitter

Flower Power

What to do while you're waiting on God?

Serve if you hope to survive.

How to tell if your frog is happy?

Why am I never satisfied with anything?

There is heaven―try it!

 

How do you signify an inch?

It might take you countless thousands of years to raise yourself one inch spiritually, but it is an inch in the right direction.

How to connect to fairies?

Fairies are listening—beware!

―—William Shakespeare in Spirit

Where can you enter a complaint in Heaven?

The writer is fond of telling anyone polite enough to entertain silly talk, that when she gets to Heaven's Gate, it's going to be with a long list of complaints! At the last, the writer added that the list was growing very long indeed! It's as long as my arm! This silly joke always elicits a smile. But have you ever wondered if there is any grumbling in heaven?

Can you direct me to a place where I can enter a complaint? 

I have been kept awake by loud singing and it is an infringement on the rights of another for such conduct to be allowed. I have not seen a policeman since my arrival.

The few policemen here wear citizen's clothes was the answer, and they may be among the singers who disturbed you. You have come to a land of song and rejoicing. Strive to attune your heart to this music, which falls on my ears like a benediction from the Infinite.

Is it to shrink or become smaller?

Mere herrings are some souls. The more one tries to enlarge them, the smaller they shrink.

—William Shakespeare in Spirit

Why are some people scared of cats?

You HAVE escaped. And the mystery is a mystery still.

The stars shine nightly from His sky, the moon is lustrous, pale, yet what am I in God's own sky?

Well, fledgling, how are you? Oh—you have a few plumes scattering, but you are a gosling still.

—William Shakespeare in Spirit

Even candy wears stripes?

—William Shakespeare in Spirit

What is the shortest prayer to God?

Thy Brain, Thy Heart, Thy Hands, O Lord! Amen

What to do when your brother offends you?

If thy brother sinneth against thee and would despitefully wrong and persecute thee, return to him thy love and forgiveness. For it is written by so doing, ye will heap coals of fire on his head!

Will God forgive me?

God will not forgive you if you are bluffing.

Are wings profitable?

Earning wings―

Such a funny thing.

For, in sowing,

The character is reaping.

The perfect man is kind, funny and generous. He bends down to say hello to dogs and puts up shelves.

―Dolly Alderton

Reelin' in the years.

Angels having wings are as rare in the world of spirits as on the plane where many an angel hovers without feathered airships.

Lord, Thou knowest better than I know myself that I am growing older and will someday be old.

Keep me from getting talkative, and particularly from the fatal habit of thinking I must say something on every subject and on every occasion.

Release me from craving to try to straighten out everybody’s affairs.

Keep my mind free from the recital of endless detail—give me wings to get to the point.

I ask for grace enough to listen to the tales of others’ pains.

Help me to endure them with patience.

But seal my lips on my own aches and pains—they are increasing and my love of rehearsing them is becoming sweeter as the years go by.

Teach me the glorious lesson that occasionally it is possible that I may be mistaken.

Keep me reasonably sweet—I do not want to be a saint—some of them are so hard to live with, but a sour old person is one of the crowning works of the devil.

Make me thoughtful, but not moody, helpful, but not bossy.

With my vast store of wisdom, it seems a pity not to use it all, but Thou knowest, Lord, that I want a few friends at the end.

—Old Nun’s Prayer

Do we have guardian angels?

Your angels are the better angels of your nature.

Are they not all ministering spirits?

Meaning you draw to you the discarnate souls you correspond with.

Then I suppose my mother would be a ministering angel to me.

We do not like that term. Be natural. She is she.

Do not little children have guardian angels?

No—some things are left to earth people.

Get knocked down seven times―get up eight.

―Japanese Saying

So you have had David all day under your influence?

Yes—but it is the first time this week. It's not often I get him.

He is going down to the coast with me tomorrow.

Oh—I know that, and I'm going too.

Why—what are you going to do there?

Oh—not very much—I'm just going down for my health.

Aye, aye—I see you are at your jokes again.

No, no—I'm not joking.

—Jan Steen in Spirit

Money-hunting is the business of life and pleasure is too often found in bodily gratification and sensuous enjoyment.

The air is thick with the greed of gold, with lust of power, with self-seeking, in all its myriad forms.

The spirit—

Do you ever think what is the state of such a spirit? 

The great question then arises—

Will you conquer or ruin, exalt or destroy?

What are high truths?

We are told that we are not to resist evil, but to turn the other cheek. The world assumes that evil must be resisted by every means available.

We are told to love our enemies and bless those who curse us. The world assumes that friends are to be loved and enemies hated.

We are told that the sun rises on the just and the unjust alike. This world considers this undiscriminating—it would like to see clouds over evil people and is offended when they go unpunished.

We are told that outcasts and harlots enter the kingdom of God before many who are perfunctorily righteous. Again unfair, the world thinks—respectable people should head the procession.

We are told that the gate to salvation is narrow. The world would prefer it to be broad.

We are told to be as carefree as birds and flowers. The world counsels prudence.

We are told that it is more difficult for the rich to enter the kingdom than for a camel to pass through a needle's eye. The world admires wealth.

We are told that happy people are those who are meek, who weep, who are merciful and pure in heart. The world assumes that it is the rich, the powerful and the well-born who are happy.

—Huston Smith

How to snap out of depression?

One fit of temper can break down more healthy cells in the body than a year's smoking or eating or drinking because―and note this carefully, the forces of mental and spiritual elements are as a thousand to one of the physical ones.

Depression and cowardice in all their forms are more potent than T. B. germs at their most riotous moments.

When doctors will quit studying germs and begin to study characteristics and temperaments, they will come to a heap nearer to the goal they seek.

Gloom, pessimism, fear, discouragement and hopelessness are what kill people, not the so-called disease. Bad temper, harsh judgments, lack of patience and small powers of loving are what destroy bodies.

What do you have to do today?

I have got nothing to do today but smile.

―Simon & Garfunkel

Do you get anything to eat in your world? Don't be foolish.

—Jan Steen in Spirit

Guns! Do you mean to say you have artillery in Hell? Where do you suppose the forms of all weapons of destruction go if not to Hell?

How does the soul feel after death? If a bulletin were issued, it might read like this―no change has been reported in Roger’s condition other than his now feeling perfectly fit in bodily health. He is in the most cheerful spirits (as well as being with them), and is at this moment thoroughly enjoying himself if his face is any indication of the state of his mind. He is pleased to inform all theologians that he does not feel the least particle ‘pious’ or ‘holy,’ and is most thankful that he feels himself, and nobody else.

―Spirit Monsignor Robert Hugh Benson

A short fervent prayer is often of the greatest consequence in heaven.

Triple trouble?

The less sin you bring with you into the world of spirits, the shorter time is necessary for your unclothing.

What is the best short quote?

Life is so short.

Life in the next world, could I make you fully realise it, would seem strange to you. 

It is like and yet unlike an earthly life. 

For instance, spirits eat a simple sort of food provided for them by magic whenever they feel hungry. 

If they are in a great hurry to go anywhere, their wills seem to carry them there with the speed almost of thought. 

As for sleep, they can spend long intervals without feeling its need―

Or again, they can lie and sleep for weeks at a time, sometimes semi-conscious of all that has passed—at others, in complete slumber. 

Another strange thing is their dress, which never seems to wear out and renews itself in some mysterious fashion. 

They do not count time by days or weeks, but only as advance is made in the development of each spirit―

When a lesson has been learned, the spirit advances to a higher branch of the subject studied. 

Hope is eternal. 

As  spirits, they have all eternity before them and can stand still or go on as they please―or they may remain where they are until they are ready for the next step, and so on. 

There is no hurrying anyone faster than he chooses to go―

No interference with their liberty to live on in the same state of undevelopment if they wish, so long as they interfere with the liberty of no one else and conform to the simple rule of freedom and sympathy for all. 

None is urged to learn and none is kept back from doing so―

It is all voluntary and they are free to go where they would―

The doors are closed to non,  either in going or returning, and none ever seeks to reproach another with his faults or shortcomings, for each feels the full depth of his own. 

Those who have a strong and powerful motive to rise make rapid progress.

Why is it better to laugh and be happy?

Laugh—

Let your mirth be as pure and innocent as that of a little child—or as that of a laughing, smiling young girl whose innocent heart knows no guile.

Do not say—

Ah—I am growing old and death will soon be here.

Death is a misnomer—Translation is the better word. 

Do not worry about anything.

Everything comes right after a short time.

Think about the time, which will come sooner or later when everything will be right—

If you have made mistakes, and who has not, do not be ashamed to admit it.

Do not stubbornly hold to the mistakes because you have made them, but give up your mistakes with a smiling face and hearty goodwill.

Mistake is the great teacher of wisdom.

Do not fall heedlessly and sink in the mire without effort to recover and retrieve your fall—

If you have made a mistake—or met with a fall, rise as quickly as possible—shake off the dust, as clean as you can, and march onward with good cheer.

What is the best quote for laughter?

Laughter drives shouting away.

―Indra Devi

Got a minute?

Thy Brain―

Thy Heart―

Thy Hands, O Lord!

Amen

What is the shortest prayer to God?

Thou art good! 

How does your heart feel pain?

It is pain that mellows the heart.

—The Judge

What is the pain threshold test?

When it comes to giving until it hurts, most people have a very low threshold of pain.

A body of a feather’s weight moves swiftly when propelled by free will.

If a man were to become an archangel in a few years’ time, he would suffer terribly from growing pains. 

© 2025 Luisa Rodrigues All rights reserved.